Scene: Bayville High courtyard

Scott, Jean, Evan, Kurt, and Kitty are sitting at a table, having lunch. They're discussing Duncan Matthews' party. No one seems to be much interested.

Kitty: I'd go.
Scott: No freshmen allowed.
Kitty: Duncan *is* a jerk.

Evan has already collected about ten cartons of milk.

Evan: (to Kurt) Hey, you gonna finish that moo juice?
Jean: You can have mine.

Scott: What about Kurt? That holo-projector won't stop people feeling his fur.
Kurt: Hey! Chicks dig the fuzzy dude! (leans over to Kitty) Riiight?
Kitty: I am so outta here. Later!
Kurt: Oh yeah. She can't resist.

Scott begins to worry that the Brotherhood might come to the party and cause trouble.

Scott: We're not the only mutants in the school, you know.
Evan: Yeah, just the cool ones. (high-fives Kurt)
Jean: Come on, Scott. What's wrong with a little socializing?
Scott: I'm sorry, but I just don't think it's a good idea.
Kurt: Yeah, man. It's just a party! (jumps up and starts doing the famous table-dance) Time to shake that tail! Party party party!

His tail falls out of the holographic field. Scott grabs it and pulls Kurt back into his seat.

Scott: Now see, that's exactly what I'm talking about!
Kurt: You pulled my tail, man!
Scott: Grow up, Kurt.
Kurt: Lighten up, dude!
Scott: You're always goofing around!
Kurt: And *you're* seriously cramping my style.
Scott: Listen-
Kurt: No, you listen. There's a sound I want you to hear, and it's {bamf}.
Scott: Blew it, didn't I?
Jean: Oh yeah.
Evan: Totally.

Rogue is sitting under a tree, reading _Dracula_. She hears a noise and smells something.

Kurt has teleported into a basement area, right into a pile of boxes.

Kurt: I have *got* to work on my reentries.

His holowatch is dying as he looks at it.

Kurt: Ah, weak, man!

He hears Rogue coming down the stairs, but doesn't realize it's her. He looks between the door she's about to enter by, and one labeled "Stay Out". He 'ports blind into the next room. There, he coughs on the dust.

Kurt: Man, someone should fire the custodian.

He looks around and begins to cross the room, breaking an infrared beam. Some TV screens turn on.

Forge on TV: January 22, 1978. If you're hearing this message, you have 10 seconds before this lab self-destructs. Have a nice day! - What's left of it.

And a big red 10 shows up on the screen.

Roll credits!

Kurt runs up to the keyboard and starts hitting buttons.

Kurt: I knew I should have paid more attention in computer lab!

Outside, Rogue approaches the "Stay Out" door, just as the lab explodes and Kurt is flung out into another pile of boxes.

Rogue (running to him): Hey - hey. Are you okay? What happened?
Kurt: Lab ... booby-trapped.
Rogue: Lab? (walks into the other room) Well, whatever it was, it's thrashed now. (sees Middleverse machine) Except for this.
Kurt (entering): What are you doing here anyway?
Rogue: Look who's talking! At least I didn't blow the place up!
Kurt (sees Rogue holding Middleverse machine, runs to grab it): Let go of that!
Rogue: Back off, blue-boy! Who says you're in charge here?

The machine makes powering-up noises. Kurt lets go and backs away. He's enveloped in a bubble of pretty colors.

Kurt: Was? Aaahh!

He disappears, and the bubble shrinks away. Rogue throws the machine across the room, then waves her hand in the remaining sparklies.

Rogue: He's *gone*.

Kurt and his bubble reappear in an empty hallway of Bayville High. Everything is foggy and weird.

Kurt: What happened? Where am I? The Twilight Zone?

Translucent students start appearing and walking around, but none of them seem to notice him. Kitty and Evan come by.

Evan: Scott's gotta lighten up.
Kitty: Yeah, but Kurt's gotta, like, know when to quit.
Kurt: Kitty? Kitty!

He tries to stop her, but his hand goes right through her shoulder.

Kurt: What's happening to me?

Scene: Bayville High parking lot

Todd is on the ground, stalking a bug. A car honks at him, and he backs away.

Todd (looking under the car): Aw, my lunch!
Darkholme (getting out of the car and walking away): You are to stay away from his area, Mr. Tolenski. If I see one drop of slime on my new car, it's detention for life. Are we clear?
Todd: Oh yes. We're very clear. (blows a raspberry)

Scene: The basement

Rogue has the Middleverse machine on a pole. She's carrying it to the dumpster. She tries to put it in, but it bangs against the side and falls to the ground.

Todd: What's this?
Rogue: Don't touch it!
Todd: Why not?
Rogue: It's - never you mind! Just leave it alone. (picks it up and tosses in dumpster)
Todd: Aw, little Rogue get into some trou-ble?
Rogue: Trouble? No. There's just one less X-Man to push us around.
Todd: Say what? This thing toasted one of them goodie-goods? Wicked! (looks in at it)
Rogue: Just leave it alone, swamp-breath! (walks off)
Todd: Geez, what is this? Abuse the Toad Day?

He retrieves the machine from the dumpster and pokes a button. As it powers up again, he drops it in favor of clinging to a tree. A bubble appears and takes away the dumpster.

Todd: Coool...

Scene: Bayville High hallway

Scott: So you think I should apologise to Kurt.
Jean: What matters is what *you* think.
Scott: You gotta admit, he jerks around way too much.
Jean: Is that worth losing a friend over?

Two boys come out of the bathroom.

Running Boy 1: Ghost!
Running Boy 2: A blue and hairy demon!
Running Boy 1: I'm outta here!
Scott: I *told* him... (goes to look in the bathroom, comes back out) He's not there. You better try to contact him.

He takes her books, and she scans Bayville High, then the Institute.

Jean: I can't pick up a trace of Kurt anywhere. It's like he doesn't exit.

Rogue is hiding around the corner, listening.

Scott: Try again. He's gotta be somewhere.
Jean: I'm not getting anything. He's just completely disappeared.
Scott (sees Lance and Fred approaching): Or someone's done something to him. (to Lance) Where's Kurt?
Fred: Like we'd tell you!

Scott slams Lance against the lockers, but Fred picks him off. Jean warms up her psychic powers.

Lance: Back off, Red, or I'll rock ya. (lockers begin to shake a little)

A crowd of students gathers, cheering "Fight! Fight! Fight!"

Darkholme: *What* is going on here?
Fred: We weren't doin' nothin'.
Lance: Yeah, Summers just went ballistic on us for no reason.
Scott: Oh, I've got a reason.
Jean: Scott-
Darkholme: Enough! The two of you, in my office.

Lance makes the loser sign as Scott and Jean pass.

Scene: Middleverse

Kurt teleports into another empty hallway.

Kurt: Wherever I am, I can't teleport out.

A big wooden desk appears above him, and he jumps out of the way.

Kurt: Aah! It's raining furniture!

Scene: Darkholme's office

Todd (in uniform, with Middleverse machine): Heh-heh. See the desk, don't see the desk. (zaps chair) See the chair, don't see the chair. So, Ms. Big-shot, how do you like my new clean-office policy? (hears Darkholme outside) Uh-oh. (jumps out the window)

Darkholme: I don't care *what* influence Xavier has with the school board, I'm going to make sure the two of you get - (opens office door) What? Who took all my furniture? (runs back out)

Jean and Scott cross to the window to see Todd vaporise Darkholme's car.

Scott: Bet I know what happened to Kurt.

Scene: Middleverse

Kurt teleports to avoid the falling car.

Scene: Darkholme's office

Translucent-Kurt floats through the room.

Jean: Look, it's Kurt!
Scott: Or his ghost.
Jean: No, I got a brief reading. It's like he's trapped somewhere.
Scott: I think we need to have a talk with the Toad.

Scene: Bayville High gym, in the Middleverse

As Kurt enters, he senses a shadow behind him and teleports to the wall above the door.

Forge: Hello. How'd you get in here?

Kurt jumps down from his hiding place.

Forge: What are you?
Kurt: Relax - don't let my looks fool you. I'm a harmless blue fuzzball - really! Hey, I know you. You're the one on the computer screen in the lab - just before it blew.
Forge: Yeah. The name's Forge. So you found my lab! Uh, what's with the Halloween get-up?
Kurt: No costume. I'm human. But I'm a mutant. I know I look strange, but - (teleports closer to Forge) there *are* some fringe benefits.
Forge: Trippy! I thought *I* was the only one!

He turns his arm into something ... well, it's something I wouldn't want to be on the wrong end of.

Scene: Bayville, somewhere

The X-Men, all in uniform, are chasing Todd. He turns around to zap them.

Jean: Shadowcat, down!

Kitty phases into the ground, and a fountain gets vaporised instead.

Scene: Bayville High gym, in the Middleverse

Forge and Kurt are sitting at a table. Well, actually Kurt is sitting on it. The fountain falls next to them.

Kurt: Man! Someone is really giving that gizmo of yours a workout.
Forge: 'That gizmo' is a transdimensional projector. My science fair project back in '78. When I fired it up, it created this pocket dimension. I call it the Middleverse. I got caught in the ray myself and was transported here. Everyone was totally freaked when I disappeared. They locked my lab. I've been here ever since.
Kurt: '78? But you still look -
Forge: Like I did then? Yeah, I can't explain it either.
Kurt: So there's no way back?
Forge: No, at least not without help from the other side. But I think you may be able to help out on that. And let me tell you, I'm ready to go home.

Some girls walk towards their locker room. Kurt fluffs himself.

Kurt: So... how far does this Middleverse extend?
Forge: Stops just short of the girls' locker room. Isn't that a burn? ... Done!
Kurt: What is it?
Forge: This baby will alter the phase-shifting properties of your teleportation powers.
Kurt: Uh... my English is a little limited.
Forge: It will allow you to get back to the real world. But only for a sec. With luck, you should be able to tell someone on the other side how to reset the machine and get us out.
Kurt: Man... I just hope they don't think I'm joking. ... I kinda have that rep.

Scene: Bayville, somewhere

Todd is up a tree.

Todd: I'm warning you -

Scott zaps the branch he's sitting on. Jean catches the machine and levitates it to herself. Todd tries to escape, but Evan pins him to the tree with a spike.

Scott: Now, tell us what you did to Kurt.
Todd: I didn't do nothin'!
Rogue: He didn't. I did.

She leads them back to the basement. Kitty and Evan say some garbage about the machine, and Scott makes a Fearless Leader decision to zap it.

Forge: No, they've got it all wrong! If they destroy the machine, we'll be trapped here forever!

Commercial break!

Scott puts the machine on a table.

Scott: Everyone, back up. I'm going to use full-power. This could get messy.
Kitty: You know, I could just phase through it and quietly short it out.

Evan and Scott stare at her.

Kitty: Forget I said anything. (to Jean) Like, what is it with guys and explosions?

Kurt: Hurry up! They're going to destroy it any second!
Forge: Done. I think it will work. I was pretty rushed, but -
Kurt: Just tell me what to do!
Forge: Push that button there, and teleport. Tell them not to destroy the machine. They have to reset it.
Kurt: Okay, I'm gone. (teleports) Reset! Don't - (gets dragged back into the Middleverse)
Scott: Uh, did you guys see that?
Evan: Yeah. He said "Reset, don't." You know, don't reset. He wants you to blow it up. Do it!
Kitty: I swear, these guys are like obsessed!
Scott: I don't know. It sounded more like a warning.
Evan: A warning, from the goofman himelf? No way. Shred that sucker!
Forge: Man, you *do* have a rep.
Scott: Kurt's a joker, but he wouldn't joke about this. Anyway, if he wanted us to blow it up, why wouldn't he say 'don't reset', instead of 'reset', then 'don't'? I think we should reset.
Kurt: Yes! You the man, Cyke!

Scott finds and pushes the reset button. A temporary portal opens. Kurt wants to teleport out, but his batteries have no more power.

Kurt: Another power source... I know! (teleports inside Middleverse)
Evan: What are they doing?
Scott: I don't know, but I hope they hurry.
Todd: There they are. And they still got that vaporiser.
Lance: Rogue, Mystique has been looking for you.
Scott: You're with Mystique?
Rogue: You got your friends, I got mine. But this ain't my fight. I'm outta here.
Fred: Fork it over.
Scott: The machine stays with us. X-Men, keep that portal open!
Lance: Your call.

A fight begins.

Scene: A hallway in the Middleverse

Forge: Groovy ride, man. So where's this power source?
Kurt: Check it. (points to Darkholme's car)
Forge: Far out! (goes to work on car)
Kurt: I swear, that homie's lingo is so whack!

Scene: The battle

Scott blasts Fred.

Fred: It takes more than that to fell the Blob.
Scott: Thanks for the tip.

He makes a crack in the floor around Fred, and Jean lifts out the concrete to make him fall in the hole.

Lance: Hey, Pretty Kitty, how about a ride on the concrete coaster?

He makes an earthquake, and Kitty is bounced around until she falls through the wall. She jumps back in.

Kitty: Lousy ride, loser!

Todd: Come on, show me what you got. You ain't got nothin'. That's right, you ain't got nothin'.
Evan (makes a row of spikes for Todd to crash into): You call that nothin', you slimy superball?

Scene: Middleverse

Kurt: Are you sure this will work?
Forge: No.
Kurt: Wunderbar. Let's hit it!

He accelerates down the hallway, and teleports. The car zooms out of the portal. Kurt slams on the brakes, but it's Fred who stops the car.

Fred: Whoa. Good thing I'm the Blob.
Todd (peeks out from behind him): You can say that again.
Lance (sees Middleverse machine has been run over): Come on, guys. This party's over.
Forge (poking airbags): What the heck are these?
Kurt: Reentry cushions! Cool, eh?

Scene: Bayville High parking lot, Scott's car

Scott: Do you want to join us, Forge? Xavier's cool; you'd like him.
Forge: No, I gotta go find my parents. I'm twenty years late for curfew.
Scott: Need a lift?
Forge: No, it's just a few blocks.

Scott gives Forge the Institute's phone number. The rest of them get in the car.

Scott: Kurt... you're going to have to duck until we can get you a new holowatch.
Kurt: It's true! You *are* ashamed of me.
Scott: Oh, about earlier... my bad.
Kurt: No, it was on me too.
Scott: No, you were right. I need to lighten up.
Kurt: And I guess I can try to dial it down a little.
Scott: So, let's go home, gear up, and run a level three sim in the Danger Room.
Kurt: Now see, that's exactly what I'm talking about!
Scott: Psych!
Kurt: Okay, very nice.
Kitty: Mr. Serious, making a joke? Wow, check his temperature.
Scott: Let's go to Duncan Matthews' party.
Kitty: I can't. I'm a freshman, remember?
Scott: You're also an X-Man.
Jean: We'll make it happen.

And they drive off.

The End

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